A lot of people have the same idea about what a relationship should be. Sometimes these people are compatible; sometimes the old rule of “opposites attracts” comes into effect. As much as I hate labels and categories, I have come to terms that there are certain ways different people handle relationships.
Have you ever been with a possible interest and talked about how you feel about relationships in general and heard, “Oh, you’re one of those types of people?” They make it sound like they heard about “your kind” on the last Oprah. As much as you may disagree with your possible interest’s assessment, there are categories people fall into when dating.
Here are a few familiar “types.”
First are those who live by the old saying, “love like you’ve never been hurt.” Those are the die-hard romantics. They can be completely devastated, get over it and keep on truckin’.
Second are the opposite kind of people. They live their lives with brick walls surrounding their hearts, making passing through about as easy for people as breaking into Fort Knox. Typically they leave trails of heartaches in their paths. They allow people in just enough to touch the wall before dropping them like a bad habit.
The third category is made up of the bottom feeders. They receive attention, comfort and all the things that come with a relationship without having to truly commit. Their significant others are so giving they really have no chance of creating any concept of sacrifice and devotion.
Somewhere within these categories are the sub-categories of the clingy, jealous and doting.
These are the typical categories people into which stumble. This shouldn’t come as a shock. We’re human and don’t live the perfect relationship lives. We fall off the tracks and make dumb choices. Sometimes others out there with their self-proclaimed perfect relationships want to crucify those who aren’t romantically and emotionally perfect. Is it possible they haven’t heard there’s no such thing as a perfect relationship? Sure a few come pretty close, but in the end they are still flawed in some way. Whether there is only one correct way to love or endure relationships is a relative matter. What is perfect for one may not be perfect for another.
What category do you fall under? Have you ever really examined the way you love? It’s easy to see which types are destructive and which are positive.
It is possible-and logical-that many people are a combination of all three types.
No simple answer exists to the question of what they all mean, just that people fall into patterns when in relationships.
I’ll leave you with this: If so much of who we are is dependent upon who we let into our lives, then how do we really know if we love our own way, or someone else’s?
Lauren Bounds is a senior communication major. She can be reached at [email protected].
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People fall into dating ‘types’
Lauren Bounds
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February 17, 2004
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