It’s hard for me to believe I am now a junior in college. I don’t know where these past two years went, but I do know that in them, I have changed. I can feel myself “growing up.” And with all this change comes one of the most important events in most people’s lives: marriage.
I feel our culture has completely missed the mark about what a wedding should mean. I could turn on the TV at any time of day and probably find a show on about weddings (which I usually end up watching).
I see brides who absolutely insist this day is all about them, what they want, how they want it and no matter how horribly they act toward the people who love them, they deserve to be treated like a princess. They don’t care that their “perfect dress” is $10,000 in spite of their families’ budgets. It’s all about them. No one else.
The delusions of grandeur expressed by these bridezillas are influential. It drives home the notion that it’s “their day” to be treated like royalty, no matter what. Sure, seeing these crazy women make idiots of themselves on television is extremely entertaining, but it’s just sad to see their states of mind ripple into “real life.” You think you wouldn’t see things like bizarre meltdowns or a grown woman treating her friends like garbage in the world outside of bridal reality TV, but you do.
I guess what it really comes down to is we, as human beings, are selfish by our nature. When there is an open door for society to claim it is okay to act like a complete jerk, we barge right in, and girls are the worst. For crying out loud, there are several TV programs devoted to acting as trashy and mean as possible (“Bad Girls’ Club,” “Bridezillas,” etc.) There is really no excuse for that kind of thinking.
A wedding is not about a dress. It’s not about food, a band, how many bridesmaids you have, how many showers you have or how many guests are invited. It’s not about a party, an ambience, an “experience” for the guests or the number of people who talk about it on Facebook. You shouldn’t be worried about if you and your spouse can afford rent or not because you’re trying to pay the debts of an insanely expensive wedding. Think about your priorities.
A wedding is a celebration. It’s a ceremony showing the world you are dedicating your own life to the one you love. You are committing the rest of your life to another person. It should be the least selfish thing anyone could ever do.
I’m not saying a wedding shouldn’t be a special experience for the bride. I’m not saying it shouldn’t be a fun experience for the guests, or you shouldn’t care about what your dress looks like, who your caterers are or what your bridesmaids wear. It should be a time to exhibit fellowship, laugh, love, cry, eat, dance and anything else you and your loved one want to do to celebrate this time in your life. It should be a time to see the months of preparation pay off to reveal a significant and meaningful experience, not some extravagant production that is just for show.
I hope when I get married, the only thing people can remember from the wedding is how my future husband and I are completely head-over-heels in love. I hope they recall how much fun they had sharing in memories, reminiscing on the old and the creation of new. I hope it is never about anything else.
Mary Chase Breedlove is a junior majoring in communication. She can be contacted at [email protected].
Categories:
Wedding hype replaces institution’s meaning
Mary Chase Breedlove
•
August 30, 2011
0
More to Discover