I recently conducted a survey of 100 Mississippi State University students on the topic of sex and relationships. When asked what the most pressing sex issue facing college students is, 70 percent of students responded with an answer regarding safe sex, citing concern for STIs, unplanned pregnancy and general protection-related woes.
I wasn’t surprised. Mississippi remains annually at the top of national lists regarding teen pregnancies and sexually transmitted infections. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention recently conducted a survey on 5,000 teenage girls who experienced unplanned pregnancies. Half of the teens surveyed confessed to be not using any protection at all. Half of these teens claimed they found themselves with child because they didn’t think it was possible to get pregnant. Another quarter of the girls claimed their partner pressured them into unprotected sex.
Somehow, a huge percentage of Americans don’t understand where babies come from. Surveys of teen moms have shown girls, for some reason, believe it impossible to get pregnant while on their periods, or if it’s their first time or if they throw salt over their left shoulder when they’re finished. Girls, if you’re having sex, you can get pregnant.
Obviously, I’m an advocate for sex. I think you should have as much or as little sex as you desire, and no one has the right to tell you when or where or in which position you should be doing it. However, by neglecting protection, you’re putting yourself and others at risk.
Mississippi’s tradition of abstinence-only sex education might be to blame for this misinformation among the young and the pregnant. Without adequate education about and access to contraceptives, teenagers are left hanging on a horny limb. In the heat of the moment, it’s easy to just say “Let’s risk it!” and let the sexcapades begin.
I’m totally aware that some of you are reading this and thinking, “But it feels better without a condom!” Do you think I don’t know this? Condoms really are sort of lame. They totally lessen the sensation, they slide off, they break and they’re a general buzz kill. I know this. However, as irritating as they may be, they’re worth the troubles to avoid aforementioned complications. (Have you ever seen a picture of chlamydia? Don’t Google it if you just ate.)
Ladies, if your man claims he “can’t do it” with a condom, you need to tell him to figure it out. If he really wants that all-access pass to your lady bits, he will be able to function with or without a rubber. Getting erect and staying that way is sort of one of the main purposes of a penis. And gentlemen, stop using this line. If you’re having a hard time getting your little guy to collaborate with condoms, dedicate some quality time to yourself and a box of Trojans. Practice makes perfect!
It’s 2012. The burden doesn’t lie on either gender to provide the condoms. If you’re sexually active, keep condoms at your place of residence, or wherever you prefer to get your freak on. (I suggest keeping some in your purse, bedside table and possibly a few hidden locations around your house. You never know! But keep track of those expiration dates.)
I love sex, and I want you to love it, too. I want you to be safe, though. STIs and pregnancy are serious problems but more importantly are avoidable ones. Remember, abstinence is the only 100 percent guaranteed birth control. However, when abstinence isn’t the choice you’ve made, it’s up to you to hook up responsibly. Contraceptives can be fun, too! Experiment with different varieties of condoms, from ribbed to ultra-thin to flavored to those kind that heat up and then get really cold. (Though, I really can’t endorse those last ones. Most people prefer to remain room temperature.) If you’re sexually active, remember to get tested once a year, even if you use protection. You’re a grown-up! Plus, testing is usually offered free of charge once a semester at the student health center. Jump on that safety wagon!
So to wrap this up, let me encourage you to do the same. Use birth control. Use condoms. Use your brain. Safety can feel good; I mean really good. I want to write about sex because I think it’s important. Protection is something I can’t stress enough. Let me know what you think the other most important sex issues facing college students are. This is a discussion. Enjoy yourselves, get your kicks and do your thing.