No, I can’t tell you how to fix your busted carburetor (I’m sorry), but I can give you a few helpful tips and ideas that will hopefully solve a few irksome problems and maybe get your gears a turnin’.
First up: haircuts. Though picking up a pair of shears and snipping yourself a new style may seem daunting, this endeavor is not just for the more adventurous. The big mistake people make while trying to cut their hair at home is cutting it wet. The moisture in wet hair weighs it down, making it appear longer than it really is. Once your hair is dry and styled after cutting it wet, you may be shocked when it is much shorter than it looked right after you cut it.
Always cut your hair dry, and you’ll be good as gravy. Though it will be more of a pain to clean up, it really is the only way to give yourself an accurate haircut. Cutting your own hair will save you so much money, money you could buy candy with. Try it out. If you mess up, it will grow back. If it is really awful, buy a hat! Voilà. You are now a style icon. You’re welcome.
Next: eggs, hard-boiled eggs. How do you make sure your yolks stay cheery yellow and don’t turn into a spherical globule the color of dingy T-shirt stains? Easy. The gray ring appears when your eggs are overcooked. Boil your eggs for two minutes, then turn off the heat and allow them to sit on the stove for 12 minutes. After that, immediately put eggs in ice water. Don’t peel them or put them in the refrigerator until they are cool to the touch. Now your egg yolks will always look edible instead of looking like some sort of squishy rock. This tip is brought to you by the letter E and my lovely mother, Kathy Alexander.
Finally now that you have perfectly hard-boiled eggs chilling in an ice bath and hair all over your bathroom floor, don’t you think you should do a little decorating, maybe fix a few things? Are you looking to save money? Are you feeling crafty but don’t know where to start? Here’s the thing: almost anything you can buy, you can make. Almost anything you make will be cheaper than anything you buy, unless you’re super thrifty.
The first thing you need is the right attitude. You really can do it. You can weave a rug. You can fix your toilet. You can sew a pair of pants, make a chair, bake a pie and plant a garden. Decide what you want to do. Then decide that you can do it.
The second thing you’ll need is a plan. How you come about this plan is more important for some projects than for others. For example, trying out your own cake recipe that you’ve made up on the fly is totally fine. Fiddling around with electrical wiring when you have no idea what you are doing is not. Use your head, and know your limits. You may need help or instruction for intricate or labor-intensive projects, maybe professional help, and that’s okay. Don’t ever be afraid to ask for help.
Besides materials, you’ll also need time and patience. Whether you’re sewing a throw pillow or whipping up your own laundry detergent, especially if it’s for the first time, be prepared to experience some trial and error.
Don’t get discouraged if something doesn’t work out the first time. Be patient, and try again. Remember that some of the best inventions were mistakes first, like chocolate chip cookies and Silly Putty. A world without Silly Putty would be pretty bleak. So, embrace your mistakes. Maybe what you think you’ve “messed up” is actually better than what the correct finished product would be.
If you feel like experimenting, come up with your own ideas and execute them. If you need a little inspiration, find a pattern or how-to and follow someone else’s instruction. We live in the age of information, y’all. You can pretty much find instructions for anything on the Internet. My very favorite place to find new projects is designsponge.com.
You could also always ask a friend or family member to show you how to make or do or fix something. Not only will you have a new project or hobby, you’ll also spend time with people you love.
So call your brother. With all that money you saved cutting your own hair, buy some candy and lure him into helping you plant a garden in your backyard. Afterwards, reward him with deviled eggs. Mmmmm.