It’s amazing how a song can grasp and command emotions. Every sappy love song touches someone differently and rekindles fond-or fierce-thoughts of romance.
I went through a Garth Brooks phase many moons ago. (I try not to talk about it too often.) One song I adored was “Shameless.” It wasn’t until recently that I realized what Garth (he and I are on a first name basis) was saying in the song. The song perfectly conveys the feelings of being so in love with someone that pride, inhibitions and self-control run out the door. The song is about being utterly shameless in relationships.
Some interpret the word “shameless” as a synonym for “whipped.” But, I doubt Garth would have sold as many albums if the song was called “Whipped.”
In fact, these two words have very different meanings and impact relationships differently.
So what’s the big difference?
People are concerned with being independent, even while in relationships. And in some cases they attempt to control their significant others.
This is where being whipped comes in. An unbalanced relationship among two lovers leaves room for one to become king (or queen) of the mountain.
A fear resides in most people of giving up too much of themselves and losing the control. If a relationship is right, then it shouldn’t matter whether someone has the upper hand. Control should never be an issue.
Shouldn’t it be normal for anyone in love to give everything they have for the sake of the relationship and the other person? Maybe I’m just a hopeless romantic.
In one part of the song, Garth sings, “I have my pride, but if you need to be satisfied, I’m shameless.”
This doesn’t mean that people should let their significant others run all over them. It works better if both parties are willing to be shameless.
Everyone carries a certain amount of pride whether they admit it or not. It’s understandable why this pride exists in such abundance. It is because most people don’t want to be whipped. But, too much pride creates problems with compromise, which is necessary for any kind of relationship.
Actually, those who are shameless in their relationships are whipped for each other. There’s nothing wrong with being whipped if both people share the whip.
It’s OK to give your all in a relationship. It is not weakness; it’s a sign of shameless love. But, if you’re planning on becoming a die-hard devotee, make sure the feelings are mutual first.
Lauren will answer readers’ questions. E-mail questions to [email protected]
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Being ‘whipped’ OK if it’s mutual
Lauren Bounds / The Reflector
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October 28, 2003
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