Valentine’s Day is a day that is celebrated on Feb. 14 by numerous countries in an affectionate and romantic way to say the least. People await the day to show their significant other how much they love each other traditionally through gestures, commonly including exchanging cards, delivering flowers, receiving chocolates, or going out on a date. Although the holiday has an unclear background, not knowing where it officially derives from does not seem to affect the romantic impact it has on modern day culture. However, the holiday seems to heavily emphasize spending time with and investing in a partner. But, what if you do not have a partner, or your partner does not care about Valentine’s Day? Where does this leave others and how do they approach this in a healthy manner? 

History.com explains the holiday has multiple originations, but the most common is Saint Valentine in the third century who secretly performed marriages for young lovers after Emperor Claudis decided to outlaw marriage for young men. Then, Pope Gelasius declared the 14th day of February an honorary day for the saint by the end of the 5th century. However, it was not until the 1300’s that the holiday started being associated with love. Since then, as Valentine’s Day approaches each year, the pressure it elicits is  substantial to every relationship, especially in recent decades. www.statisitcsbrain.com claims that the average American typically spends around $116.21 on Valentine’s Day and Americans altogether spend over $13 million, making Valentine’s Day a major consumer holiday. In my opinion, that’s a lot of money to spend on someone else whom you probably love just as much every other day of the year.

Mississippi State student Tiffani Allen said, “I feel as if it is always excessive and overdone, and people often expect something on Valentine’s Day.” 

53 percent of women feel inclined to end their relationship if they don’t get something for Valentine’s Day according to www.statisticsbrain.com. People who don’t get something on Valentine’s Day may feel as if the materialistic object they didn’t receive is synonymous with their self-worth, which is not the case in my opinion. In fact, that may be a direct connection to their own insecurities or loneliness. 

After reviewing a multitude of research, the Washington Post was able to conclude that, “the pain of loneliness is like the pain of hunger – it’s a biological signal that something is wrong.”

Loneliness has recently been approached as a significant health hazard, since it has a direct link to having a greater risk to health complications, such as heart attacks, Alzheimer’s and other illnesses. However, it is important to point out there is a difference between being lonely and being alone. Some people can be alone and not feel lonely, just as much as others can be surrounded by people and feel lonely. It is important that people not only find the difference between the two but learn to love themselves, by themselves, to eradicate such a risk and unhealthy mentality. 

Teresa Gawrych, MSU communication instructor, said, “I think it makes you healthier when you love yourself, because if you love yourself, then you don’t need someone to complete you.” 

When you learn to love yourself, you complete yourself without any external factor. You do not have to rely on something else to validate that void within yourself. But, how can someone get to this point?

Criminology Major Nikki Cummins, had a similar approach to how others should love themselves, by suggesting others start their day with complimenting themselves, even if it is only one thing. The more you do so, the more inclined you will be to actually love and appreciate yourself naturally.

Devan Martinez, fitness graduate assistant at the Joe Frank Sanderson Center who has helped multiple students overcome both physical and mental hurdles through group exercises, emphasized that people should, “focus on doing the most for themselves, push themselves, while still doing something they enjoy.”

MSU Take 30 News political reporter, Pranaav Jadhav, said, “Loving yourself for me is not about loving my body, loving how I look, or taking care of how I look, but it is just loving my work.” He even went as far to say, “Love yourself and what you do, and you will find success.”

Tadarius Jolly, MSU student, suggested one of the ways he has learned to love himself recently alongside his girlfriend was by, “getting closer to God.” 

Now, of course learning to love yourself does not happen overnight, and no one should beat themselves up for not appreciating themselves more than they should have this past Valentine’s Day. Why? Learning to fully appreciate and love yourself is a journey that takes everyone a different amount of time. The end goal may be important, but it is important to focus on the present choices one takes to get there. I think Rachel Ross, MSU’s Program Coordinator in the Holmes Cultural Diversity Center, put it best when she said, “It’s about the process.” As long as someone learns from their mistakes, is aware of their present choices and remains optimistic about the end goal, I personally have confidence that anyone could be on their way to a lifestyle of truly loving themselves for many Valentine’s Days to come.