As a freshman here at Mississippi State, things have been hectic for the past few weeks. However, as I’ve settled into my new home, I’ve been able to relax and take time to observe the students around me. This past week, during the usual lunch rush, I’ve become more aware of a troubling trend that isn’t exclusive to our students. As I sat and consumed my lunch, I observed the clusters of students around me. There were friends laughing, discussing their weekend plans and upcoming tests, and at first it seemed normal; however, if I observed a group long enough, I found that almost every member remained on his or her phone for an extended period of time and would disengage from the conversation. This didn’t surprise me, but the more I thought of the implications, the more I was troubled.
There’s no question that recent advances in technology have changed the way we as a society communicate. From texting to Facebook to Twitter, interaction with others is in our grasp within seconds. This past year when my father was working in Afghanistan, my family was not only able to call him everyday but see him everyday as well, with the help of a webcam. Just 10 years ago, this would have been impossible. It’s no surprise that the generation classified by its hunger for instant gratification quickly became addicted to this type of socialization.
To me, this amazing technology appeared flawless on the surface. I could reach anyone, anywhere, anytime I wanted. I used to argue these advancements enhanced communication and connected people around the globe. However, we have taken a technology meant to bring people far apart together and turned it to push those close to us further apart.
When I stop to think about it, I’m guilty of it, too. There has always been that moment when I’m mid-conversation with a friend or sitting at the dinner table and my cell phone informs me of a new message. Even if I remain polite and ignore it, my mind instantly jumps from the current conversation to the sender, what he or she needs, if it’s urgent and when I’ll have time to respond.  By this time, I’ve been inattentive to the point of where it’s rude to ask the current speaker to repeat themselves, and the whole conversation is lost.
 Not only can messaging distract during live conversations, they can also decrease the quality of socialization even when I’m not within reach of a cell phone. Especially with the globalized society we live in today, we aren’t always fortunate enough to find ourselves near those we want to speak with the most; however, those I and many are closest to usually are the ones with whom we experience the most conflict. Thus, more and more difficult situations such as break-ups and arguments are dealt with via text message. Now these highly emotional situations are being executed in a less personal way, which ultimately can stunt social development. For example, when dealing with such a situation, if I can’t meet the people in person, I would at least rather speak to them on the phone.
Although I can’t view their expression, I can gather information from their tone of voice and learn more about the person as well as how they feel as they respond. In contrast, if the entire conversation was carried out through text message, I might misinterpret how they want to convey the message, or how they are actually feeling. These misunderstandings could ultimately lead to riffs in any relationship which could have been avoided if the conversation had been carried out in person.
Face-to-face communication is more than just physically hearing and seeing what someone says. There is an energy in an exchange between two people that communicates so much more than words.  Body language, the emotional response to the visual sight of someone, can never be simulated electronically.  So, starting today, I’m challenging myself to focus less of my attention on my cell phone and any virtual social network and more on the people and experiences happening right in front of me.
Rebecca Kellum is a freshman majoring in chemical engineering. She can be contacted at [email protected].