I watched in quiet speculation at the world below me. How could I have missed so much when I used to live on Earth? I missed the sensations I used to feel down there when I would encounter people; happiness, fear, sadness, all of them were gone to me now for I never saw anybody in the half-way between Heaven and Earth. All I was able to witness was through a small pool of water that let me see everything going on below me. I was fascinated with those I had left behind. The morning of the accident may have killed me, but those that had survived felt more emotions in a day than I felt up here in a year. The main emotions I felt were concern and awe for those who were living and wonder for those who lived above me. I think for another few minutes about my mother, who is in the kitchen that I used to go to every night for a home-cooked meal, before I turn away and look for my friend Elsie. Almost immediately I spot her; she is now 21, as are most of my old classmates, and she is currently getting ready for some special occasion. I leave her in peace, and then go to watch my father driving home from work. He has my favorite song playing in his car, “I’m Already There” by Lonestar, and I stay with him until he gets all the way home. There I check on my mother again and then go to my younger sister’s room. Nineteen-year-old Kelsey, my younger sister, sits on her bed stroking her fluffy white cat that I got her, Sugar, on the head. I hear her whisper something, and I lean my head down, even though it isn’t necessary, as I listen to her. “Happy birthday, Eleanor,” she says.
To me it is the best birthday gift I have received and I quickly go back and check on everybody else in my family before I go back to her. Now, the cake that my mom has been making all day makes sense, as does my father leaving work early and my best friend dressing up for an occasion that I thought I had missed. I leave my family behind for a few minutes as I turn back to Elsie, now driving through the streets, and I stay with her as she goes through the city, once tapping the wheel of her car to the right to avoid a swerving car before she could even think about it. “Thank you, Ella,” I hear her whisper to her little glass angel that hangs from her rearview mirror. I smile inwardly but stay focused on the road, staying with her as she pulls into the drive.
She steps out of the car in a white and green dress and then takes a small box out of the backseat of her car. It also happens to be wrapped in green, my favorite color, as is the cake that is waiting inside for her and my family to share. I walk beside her as she goes up the front walk, lifting a small breeze around us just to see if she notices. Of course she does; she’s all about signs right now and she pauses on the threshold just as my mother opens the door. “Hello, Elsie,” my mother says as she steps forward and gives her a hug.
“Hello,” Elsie says as she returns the hug, the green on their dresses matching perfectly even though the prints are completely different. “Ella’s here.”
“Of course she is,” my mother says, smiling sadly, “she never misses her birthday.” I smile as I raise the wind around them again; little does she know that I’m with them at some point every day. “See, she’s trying to prove it to us.” I watch as they link arms and walk inside, talking all about me and their favorite memories of me. I start to follow before I start to feel something different, something abnormal for me to feel: fear. I go back up to my spot in the sky and look around at everybody I know, trying to figure out who has caused me to feel such alarm. Nobody really close, but I can tell that something is really wrong. I go back through all of the faces I’ve ever seen in my life and come to a screeching halt when I realize it’s one of my old classmates. Mathew?

-*-
 
I walked along the empty old highway as I took a sip of the vodka I’d snuck from my old dad’s place. It’s not like he would ever miss it, the whole lower half of his house was filled with other alcoholic stuff just like this. It was refreshing on a cool night like this, and it was just enough to make me forget all of my troubles. Sure, I’d wake up in some random place tomorrow, but that was why I drank out here and not in town. It was fun to think of all of my awful memories flowing away, sort of like the vodka was flushing them out of my system. Being beaten to a pulp on Wednesday by a group of thugs, gone. Failing all of my exams and flunking out of college, history. Being reminded for the billionth time from my wicked aunt that I was a good-for-nothing son earlier today, no more. All of these painful things disappeared from me and left me standing in a cemetery.
“Huh,” I say out loud as I sit down by a tree and survey the area. It’s not bad; probably a better place for me to be walking around when I’m drunk instead of a highway that was rarely used, and I take refuge there as I finish off the whole bottle. I get up as soon as I am done and throw the bottle against the nearest headstone as I walk off. I haven’t gone three feet when I stumble on a tree root and fall forward landing in the shattered glass of my bottle. “Shit!” I dab at the blood running down my hands and look around wondering which way I should go to find my house. Instead I find myself staring at the headstone. “Eleanor Whitson,” I breathe heavily as more painful memories shoot through me this time of my deceased mom, the person lying underneath me. I stagger upright and start running, not caring about anything other than getting as far away from the cemetery as I stumble into the road. I hear a flurry of honks and I turn to look to my right as lights illuminate my face. I watch in nothing more than surprise as a driver careens down the highway and smashes into me. I’m alive when I hit the ground, but I know I won’t be by the time I get to the hospital. I take one deep, bloody breath as I feel myself drift off, and I leave all of my mental and physical pain behind.