My ex-boyfriend and I are really good friends and we hang out in the same group all the time. How should I go about telling him I still have feelings for him and want to get back together?
Whatever you do, don’t fall victim to your inhibitions and dance naked on stage at a local bar, lip-sinking to Whitney Houston’s “I Will Always Love You.”
Instead, go about this matter discretely. There are many things you can do to persuade your ex to like you back without him realizing what you’re doing.
In the process of trying to win over his heart (again), steer clear of outrageous performances.
Avoid the following:
* Calling in the wee hours of the morning while drunk
*buying him something extremely expensive he begged you to get him back when you two were together.
*Trying to get your message passed through your friend’s grapevine.
*The embarrassing stage act I mentioned earlier.
Instead, have confidence in yourself. Use poise and believe in yourself whenever you’re in public, with or without him. Eventually you will carry this with you no matter where you go. Sooner or later he will notice what amazing self-assurance you possess. You naturally radiate a more attractive persona once you abolish all insecurities.
Look your best when going out on the town with the group.
Hold your head high and make yourself believe that he is the one who should be going after your bad self.
Here’s where the fun begins. Flirt if you like, but don’t be obnoxious. Have meaningful conversations with other guys even though you can’t let your ex out of the corner of your eye.
And when your ex catches your wandering eye mysteriously let him know you have something juicy on your mind. Bite your lip, twist your hair, do anything subtly seductive and then slowly look away.
But don’t sprint to his side if he shows some minor attention toward you. When he calls you, don’t pick up right away.
The ball is in your court. Don’t throw it back immediately. He will not be interested if he sees you are available for his every beck and call.
Make him fit into your schedule. The only reason you would need to call him at this point would be if your car broke down or some other maintenance tragedy occurred.
Let him know the other manly males you were going to call are all in class or at work. Let it be obvious that he is not the only guy in your life. You have many others waiting in line-flowers in hand.
It’s important to do what needs to be done without overdoing it. If he shows interest, don’t go. Try to blow him off.
He may get the impression that you are truly too hard to catch. Instead, talk about the good things you used to do together if he seems comfortable and offers compatible conversation. If your persuasion tactics don’t work there are other potential guys that would trip all over themselves to have you.
If you work on getting him back without becoming a psychotic stalker then you’re headed for happy endings. After a while, he will realize what a lunatic he was for letting you get away in the first place.
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Categories:
Between Love and Hate
Crystal Christensen
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September 5, 2003
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