“Momma, are the days marked off?”
Every day, 4-year-old Rylan Moore asks this simple question and every time his mother Lynda responds, “Not yet.”
Each day Lynda and Rylan place a sticker on a calendar. At his age, Rylan has enough cognition to know that he hasn’t seen his father David in a long time, but not quite enough to understand when he will see his father again. Brother Corey, 2, has faint memories of David, while 8-month-old Tanner does not know his father.
“My husband loves what he does, but hates that he misses so much of his children’s lives,” Moore says. “He listened to our first child being born on the telephone.”
Lynda and David moved to Starkville in August 2001. She is in her second year at MSU as an athletic academic advisor who serves around 150 student athletes from men’s basketball, softball, volleyball and men’s and women’s tennis and track.
A conspicuous camouflage hat sits in her office atop her bookcase while a picture of a man in his early thirties and pictures of the three boys adorn her desk.
While she enjoys her job, life is hectic and never slow. David is a licensed exterminator who serves as a military policeman in the Army National Guard. In 2001, Lynda Moore was more than occupied with a new house, a new job, raising one child with another one on the way and David’s deployment for training. Things have not let up since.
“He’s been to four bases in 15 months,” Moore explains. “From Jan. 2 to Dec. 18, 2002, he was in Cuba for six months and in Kentucky the other six months.”
Moore puts “Rosie the Riveter” to shame with her tirelessness: being on the go for 17-plus hours a day while sleeping six hours on a good night, but usually only four or five.
“I never think about not doing it. My husband has to have me hold the fort down so we will have a good life when he gets back,” Moore continues. “He can’t be a soldier if he is worried about home.”
Lynda receives help with the boys from her brother David Knighton, a manager for the volleyball team and other members of the Mississippi State family.
“I can call him anytime, and he’ll say, ‘I’ll be right there.’ John Blackwell (assistant volleyball coach) and his wife Jackie have helped me out so much and so has the Church of Christ on campus,” Moore says.
“I fully support what America is doing in Iraq. No one likes to see family go, but there are women worse off than me-at least David is not in combat. I couldn’t say, ‘Send your husband, but not mine.’ to anyone.”
Destination Unknown
By taking a few thousand steps across campus from Moore’s office, one will reach Shira Fieldhouse and the office of assistant strength coach Richard Akins, who bears the responsibility of toughening up Bulldog athletes.
On his wall Akins, whose father, Henry, served in the Navy in Vietnam, has a Bobby Knight quote about discipline and a bumper sticker that states his pride in his daughter. In his 20th year at MSU, the Ethel native and his wife Cindy recently spent a week with their daughter, Beth, 23, before she shipped off with the Air National Guard.
Although being an air traffic controller was not the original plan that Beth had, Richard has Beth’s silhouette from M-16 target practice to prove her skill and precision.
“She originally wanted to be a veterinarian, but didn’t want to be in school that long. She loves animals: horses, dogs, cats-little chubby people,” Richard said with a smile.
He and Cindy took care of Beth’s paperwork (will, bills, residential papers) and enjoyed spending time with each other the week they were out there.
The day that Beth left Cheyenne, Wyo., she did not know where she would be going.
“I got every look I could. Other than burying my father (WWII and Korea veteran SFC Jesse Strider), saying goodbye to Beth was the hardest thing I have done,” recalled Cindy.
“She (Beth) was grinning-ready and wanting to go,” Richard remembered. “I told her how proud I am, and to keep her head down and her guns loaded.”
Mind in the matters
Lynda Moore and Richard and Cindy Akins are determined to remain strong mentally to show support for loved ones, but what about the psyche of the troops?
“The amount of stress depends on a person’s position because the level of danger varies,” explains Sam Freeman, a National Guard member and student at MSU who is working toward a psychology degree. “At the front lines, there is probably psychological damage (post-traumatic stress syndrome) that will never go away, like when you may have to take another person’s life or see your friends die.”
Helping at home
Figuring out the best way to help troops and their families is not always easy. Moore encourages people to support the troops and says: “If you know someone in the military, or a single parent, see if they need help with a simple task like getting milk. Things like that can be such a help.” She could probably use some new stickers, too. She and Rylan have at least 255 more days to mark off.