Two hundred and twenty-four days. That is the number of days until I put on the ole gown and tassel for the last time and work it down the stage to Kelly Rowland’s “Motivation” at The Pony.
Two hundred and twenty-five days. That is the number of days until I put on the ole cap and gown and work it down the stage to receive my master’s degree. Although the diploma will be invaluable, no one is going to throw singles at me while I “make it rain” like the night before. But what if people did?
Students, faculty and that really friendly female worker at the bakery, I am asking that we do one thing over the next seven months: revamp graduation.
Yes, it may be a little early to start discussing g-day, but if the past few ceremonies are any indication, we need to start now.
First, I am SO over the black robes.
Whoever said black is slimming did not see those drop cloth duds. They may do an adequate job covering my thunder thighs, but I need something with a low V-neck to show off my chest. If this wish is granted, I will be sure no one shaking hands will have wandering eyes (My eyes are up here, Mr. President.)
Also, whose idea was it to wear the caps? Some of us are blessed with an abundance of forehead and these tops do us no favors.  I also do not care for looking like Eddie Munster with a tassel; I am much more of a Herman, but I digress. 
I ask that we make the ceremony cap-optional. This does not mean that caps could cease to exist, but rather you have the choice of wearing any top you want.  I may feel festive and want to wear a yamaka or perhaps a nice headscarf like Erica Badu.
If any of the deans wear the same cap as you, you must chest bump them, no exceptions.
I also think it will be beneficial if we have a song of our choice playing after announcing our name.
I am calling dibs on Queen’s “Fat Bottomed Girls” so don’t even think about it.
After three hours of hearing names and being surprised to see that girl from your freshman composition class made it through, we are really going to need something to spice things up.
Thankfully, I just finished reading “The Hunger Games” and have a great idea: 12 members of the graduating class will be called to compete to the death.
The victor will be given a $25 gift certificate to Barnes & Noble and coupons to Buffalo Wild Wings.
This game is all fine and dandy unless my name is called, in which the competition changes to an Oprah-like moment where we all get cars.
In all seriousness, I am pretty sure the above rules may take years to implement, but there is something we can do now to improve graduation: get better speakers. 
When was the last time you went to a Mississippi State University commencement and actually felt inspired enough to pay attention?
Nothing against our past speakers, but I want to see someone take the podium who commands the coliseum. Someone who those in attendance actually look forward to hearing. This state has birthed some of the most recognizable voices in the world (Morgan Freeman and Oprah, I am talking to you.) Yes, they may be long shots, but if Miami Dade College can land President Obama for its 2011 graduation, MSU should at least throw its hat into consideration for someone of substantial stature. 
Last May, Ole Miss had Dan Rather, The University of South Carolina had Supreme Court Justice Sonia Sotomayor and Harvard had Amy Poehler at its Class Day. Great speakers can come from all fields and MSU should take note.
Two hundred and twenty-four days. That is the number of days until I put on the ole gown and tassel for the last time and work it down the stage to Kelly Rowland’s “Motivation” at The Pony.
Two hundred and twenty-five days. That is the number of days until I put on the ole cap and gown and work it down the stage to receive my master’s degree. Although the diploma will be invaluable, no one is going to throw singles at me while I “make it rain” like the night before. But what if people did?
Students, faculty and that really friendly female worker at the bakery, I am asking that we do one thing over the next seven months: revamp graduation.
Yes, it may be a little early to start discussing g-day, but if the past few ceremonies are any indication, we need to start now.
First, I am SO over the black robes.
Whoever said black is slimming did not see those drop cloth duds. They may do an adequate job covering my thunder thighs, but I need something with a low V-neck to show off my chest. If this wish is granted, I will be sure no one shaking hands will have wandering eyes (My eyes are up here, Mr. President.)
Also, whose idea was it to wear the caps? Some of us are blessed with an abundance of forehead and these tops do us no favors.  I also do not care for looking like Eddie Munster with a tassel; I am much more of a Herman, but I digress. 
I ask that we make the ceremony cap-optional. This does not mean that caps could cease to exist, but rather you have the choice of wearing any top you want.  I may feel festive and want to wear a yamaka or perhaps a nice headscarf like Erica Badu.
If any of the deans wear the same cap as you, you must chest bump them, no exceptions.
I also think it will be beneficial if we have a song of our choice playing after announcing our name.
I am calling dibs on Queen’s “Fat Bottomed Girls” so don’t even think about it.
After three hours of hearing names and being surprised to see that girl from your freshman composition class made it through, we are really going to need something to spice things up.
Thankfully, I just finished reading “The Hunger Games” and have a great idea: 12 members of the graduating class will be called to compete to the death.
The victor will be given a $25 gift certificate to Barnes & Noble and coupons to Buffalo Wild Wings.
This game is all fine and dandy unless my name is called, in which the competition changes to an Oprah-like moment where we all get cars.
In all seriousness, I am pretty sure the above rules may take years to implement, but there is something we can do now to improve graduation: get better speakers. 
When was the last time you went to a Mississippi State University commencement and actually felt inspired enough to pay attention?
Nothing against our past speakers, but I want to see someone take the podium who commands the coliseum. Someone who those in attendance actually look forward to hearing. This state has birthed some of the most recognizable voices in the world (Morgan Freeman and Oprah, I am talking to you.) Yes, they may be long shots, but if Miami Dade College can land President Obama for its 2011 graduation, MSU should at least throw its hat into consideration for someone of substantial stature. 
Last May, Ole Miss had Dan Rather, The University of South Carolina had Supreme Court Justice Sonia Sotomayor and Harvard had Amy Poehler at its Class Day. Great speakers can come from all fields and MSU should take note.
If the university wants to bring someone related to the school, then bring someone whose charisma and passion cannot be faked *cough* Hank Flick/ Whit Waide *cough*. 
May 2012 will represent a major milestone for thousands of MSU students. It’s time we have a ceremony equally as impressive. Let’s start the campaign now to guarantee this.
 
Patrick Young is a graduate student in public policy and administration. He can be contacted at opinion@reflector.msstate.edu.
 
If the university wants to bring someone related to the school, then bring someone whose charisma and passion cannot be faked *cough* Hank Flick/ Whit Waide *cough*. 
May 2012 will represent a major milestone for thousands of MSU students. It’s time we have a ceremony equally as impressive. Let’s start the campaign now to guarantee this.
 
Patrick Young is a graduate student in public policy and administration. He can be contacted at opinion@reflector.msstate.edu.