Some Christians are passive. Some Christians are extreme. And still, some Christians wear extreme clothing.
I visited Topeka, Kan., a couple of weeks ago, and I found the most heartwarming store: Extreme Christian Clothing.
What kind of extreme Christian are you? The store’s Web site is bound to have something for your spirit. Let’s look at a few God-inspired threads.
Satan is a nerd.
If you wear this shirt, it conveys two inspirational messages. First, the shirt tells us you don’t have to be afraid of Satan. After all, he’s reading books, playing “World of Warcraft” or enjoying the latest in Cinemax porn. Most importantly, the shirt implies nerdiness is a sin. In other words, by saying “Satan is a nerd” in a derogatory manner, you wave a finger (or a cross) at all nerds. And we all know that Christianity does not call for its followers to accept other people, especially if they’re nerdy.
My God can kick your god’s butt.
This shirt is specifically for the philosophical and sophisticated Christians who want people to respect their values and principles. Nothing says, “I love you, neighbor, as Christ did,” like, “What you believe is really stupid, and I know everything!” It’s also tasteful that this shirt didn’t include any needless slang for shock value so lots of people will buy it to feel cool.
Air Jesus: The Ultimate High
One thing I respect about certain Christians is that they don’t stoop down to a particular level. They would never allude to a drug-induced condition to make following Christ seem hip or trendy. They would never compare one of the most respected teachers in history to a basketball player with his own shoe line. They would never maximize the chance of turning people off to their religion by creating the tackiest article of clothing since Adam’s leaf.
So get on the Internet. Log on to this store and buy something. Because God in Heaven must reward those who wear “Pray Dangerously.”
Categories:
Store deals in extreme Christian wear
Jed Pressgrove
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January 25, 2006
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