According to Quick Series, “One in every six American women are victims of sexual assault or rape during their lifetime.” Every once in a while ,I remember this significant piece of information while I’m on the bus transit to school, observing people while tipsy at a party, sitting in a lecture trying to distract myself from notes or even when I’m waiting in line for the bathroom. I start repeatedly counting the women surrounding me. Suddenly, my perspective on sexual assault changes, just like it did the first time I ever counted and landed on six.

Last week you or a colleague may have noticed T-shirts lining the Drill Field with powerful messages related to sexual violence.  How it affected you or your fellow peers depends on your individual experiences and perspectives with sexual violence itself. For example, the mere presence of the Clothesline Project pushed someone I know to anxiously reveal to me his own childhood sexual assault experience. However, what struck me most was the confusion he felt toward his own feelings. Studies show one in every 33 men and three percent of American men experience an attempted or completed rape in their lifetime. American women with a 17 percent chance. It’s understandable that he felt his feelings as something very foreign and difficult to grasp. In fact, the majority of men, who have been sexually assaulted, feel unheard and unrecognized as victims. However, 14 percent of men have been forced or coerced into sexual activity before they were 14-years-old. In a world where he might feel alone, he surely is not.  I could not help but feel an overwhelming amount of heartache for a fellow peer that felt so lost in a world that is waiting with open arms to aid him and others on their journeys to recovery.  I was suddenly aware of what I was telling him and wanted to be selective on how I approached the situation. I did what anyone else could do in that particular situation, I reminded him of his worth, that his feelings were validated and that I understood and was willing to if I did not. Those are just a few techniques to remember if ever approached. 

Leah Pylate, a graduate assistant who spoke on behalf of the Health Promotion and Wellness Department, was in charge of the successful program, expounded on that a bit more.  “It is always important not to engage in victim blaming. In the simplest form, we relay to people their role in this process is to believe your friend or the person who is relaying information to you regarding an unwelcomed experience,” Pylate said. “One can expect a wide range of emotions when discussing sensitive information.”

Pylate said some people may be angry, some experience relief and others may relay extreme sadness. Each individual’s experience is unique and it is important to allow the person to be empowered to choose the next step in the healing process. Communicate openly with the person, making sure to not use victim blaming communication. Provide options and resources to the person such as  calling the MSU Safeline at 662-325-3333 where the individual can speak to a counselor and request advocacy services. These are important considerations,” Leah encouraged me through one of her responses.  I will forever be grateful for the people who take the time and have the patience to set up programs that allow victims of sexual violence to have a voice and share their own experiences by courageously bringing awareness to the subject and acting as an outlet for them .

Everyone should be aware and prepared to act appropriately in order to help others if they have been affected or wish to prosper from their own experience. There are numerous ways to learn how to approach each possible perspective in a sexual assault situation, so it’s important to aim to be more involved and informed about it. Why? Next time you are walking around a significant amount of people, start counting one in every six women or one in every thirty-three men. Once you see the impact it can make in even just one surrounding, sexual assault becomes a lot more realistic with the people you casually see on an everyday basis. After you do that a couple times, end the last one on yourself, and suddenly sexual assault becomes a lot more realistic on a personal level for you. It’s all about different perspectives, and it’s time change a few, because no one is immune to sexual assault.