Nearly one year ago in an April 2006 edition of The Reflector, I offered my views on why I believe NASCAR should be considered a sport, as well as why I enjoy the sport. To celebrate the one-year anniversary of that column, I have decided to lay the foundation for something huge. With all the debate earlier this semester on whether MSU should adopt a men’s soccer program, along with it came the issue of having to add a women’s sport to balance things out.
To be the sidekick to men’s soccer, several prospects were equestrian, swimming (and diving), rifling and gymnastics. Though the soccer debate has seemed to have cooled down just a bit, with MSU athletic director Larry Templeton having put the stainless-steel Title IX dagger through the MSU students’ dreams, I would like to offer another alternative to our great athletic director.
This very idea could make Mississippi State the coolest college in America since the year we adopted cowbells as a tradition. Since the publishing of my pro-NASCAR-sport article, the people I have engaged in debate with over whether NASCAR really is a sport (whom I have all defeated, by the way) all offer the view that NASCAR is incredibly boring to watch on television. I can see where this would be true– to the ignorant viewers who believe the sport is no more than cars driving around in a circle.
Nonetheless, I’m ready to defeat stock-car-racing boredom, and I’m ready for all of the MSU campus to get to experience the sport to its fullest potential. That’s why I’m offering the campus (and nation) my proposal to adopt stock car racing as an NCAA sport. Stock car racing may be a little boring on television (but only to those ignorant viewers), but in person, there’s almost nothing like it.
Adopting this program would allow MSU students to experience the sheer joy of attending a stock car race every so often during the season. The idea would work pretty much like any other sport.
Once the sport has matured over a few years and has spread nationwide, MSU would open its stock car nonconference schedule, getting all of the comparatively unimportant races out of the way by defeating the likes of Troy, Maine and Jacksonville State en route to beginning the SEC schedule.
The SEC schedule would be formatted into a simple 12-race listing, featuring one race at each of the school’s home track. A point system would be arranged, and the points champion at the end of the SEC season would be awarded the No. 1 seed for the SEC Championship, and the rest of the seeds would be filled accordingly.
Naturally, the SEC Championship would be held right in the heart of the South, in world-famous Talladega. Whoever won the SEC Championship would receive an automatic bid to race in the 43-car (to imitate NASCAR) national championship, more than likely held at Daytona.
Now, there’s no doubt in my mind that our beloved SEC would be able to dominate in this NCAA sport, due to us going to school in the South, and apparently the only people who enjoy stock car racing are one-tooth rednecks from the South, whose families bear a striking resemblance to the Bobbys’.
I am willing to bear the burden of this stereotype if you are, as long as succeeding in this sport finally gains us recognition from ESPN and other SEC conspirators. Other than these great, non-arguable arguments, simpler reasons the sport would be a great thing to add are simple.
One, it would just be cool to see our school colors duking it out while painted on a beautiful, sleek, shiny automobile. There would be nothing like seeing our maroon car sending the navy-and-red or the eyesore-orange car (or both) into the wall and moving on to capture the checkered flag. Two, if there ever is a weekend in Starkville in which there isn’t much stuff to do, nothing could beat the experience of tailgating and partying before/during/after the big home track SEC race. Forget the Junction and Left-Field Lounge, and perhaps even the Cotton District, because if stock car racing hit MSU, the infield (grassy middle) of the track would be the most happenin’ spot on the Mississippi map.
Three, the collegiate level of the sport would offer valuable experience to those wishing to become professional stock car drivers.
In the professional-collegiate brotherhood of football, basketball and baseball, racing seems to get left out, although it is one of the biggest professional sports in America (look at the stats somewhere on the Internet to prove it).
And lastly, simply the new name of our national collegiate sports governing body would be enough to make me smile: Let’s get ready for some NCAACAR!