Have you ever found yourself feeling trapped? Not by a person or an object, but rather an idea or a feeling. In particular, have you ever felt trapped by the past?
One day you feel fine. Everything is going rather well and you’re enjoying every minute of your day when you are suddenly presented with an image, a voice or a thought that triggers an uneasy feeling. Before you have the chance to realize it, you feel burdened by an object that you are incapable of grasping.
Unfortunately, the past is something we can never escape.
Now, what is the best way to leave the past behind and move on? There is no perfect method, but coping with past events involves finding the benefits of the hard times.
We can tell ourselves we’ve learned valuable lessons and that we will attempt to avoid repeat episodes in the future, but with time, those lessons fade into the depths of our memory, and we set ourselves up for repeated mistakes. Often we have to repeat our mistakes several times before realizing that we really do have a problem that needs to be fixed.
Occasionally, there will be people in your life who don’t want you to let go of the past. If you find yourself dealing with people who are attempting to change your life on their terms, it may be important to let them know that what they are doing is not beneficial to you or the relationship.
I find myself in this predicament often, and I’m not sure I’ve ever found a faithful method of escape, but I think our hope of getting back to normal and getting out from under the burden of the past lies in forgiveness. We have to forgive those who we feel hurt us. Then, most importantly, we have to forgive ourselves for being in such a vulnerable position.
We must forgive ourselves for hurting ourselves.
I think once we realize that we can never change the past, we’ve made a step toward recovery. We then have to change how we react to the past, and that can be the hardest part of escaping the torment that lingers.
Don’t try to run from the past, and don’t try to forget the past, but, in whatever way works best for you, cope with the past and try to get on with your life. Don’t let your past control your future.
Michael Robert is a sophomore studying mathematics. He can be contacted at [email protected].