Elizabethtown
Paramount Pictures
Starring: Orlando Bloom and Kirsten Dunst
The Verdict: Cameron Crowe’s ‘Elizabethtown’ is basically a poorly executed clone of ‘Garden State.’
2/4 stars
Imagine a movie about a troubled 20-something at total odds with the present state of his life for one reason or another being forced to revisit his past by a sad circumstance beyond his control. Say, the death of a parent, perhaps. Now, let’s throw another element into the mix.
Let’s say that while all this is happening to a young anti-hero of sorts, fate or something more causes him to cross paths-in an oddly ordinary setting-with a beautiful, outgoing, incredibly unique young lady who’s everything he’s not. Let’s say that, despite his initial avoidance of her, she forces her way into his heart and changes his life forever. Ooh! One more good idea! What if the movie was named after the place that our main man has to revisit?
Sound familiar? What was just described was Zach Braff’s 2004 cult masterpiece “Garden State.” Correction, what was just described was Cameron Crowe’s newly released, very mainstream film “Elizabethtown.” Actually, it makes little difference. Almost every aspect of “Elizabethtown” is somehow uncannily similar to “Garden State.”
Though “Elizabethtown” does rather blatantly borrow from “Garden State,” it doesn’t do a bad job of it. I was actually pleasantly surprised, to a point, since I had half expected a mindless chick flick.
Crowe (“Jerry Maguire,” “Vanilla Sky”) is once again packing the star power in this one. Orlando Bloom (“Lord of the Rings,” “Pirates of the Caribbean”) heads the cast as Drew Baylor, a designer for a shoe company who is driven into suicidal depression when he loses his job over one of his products that isn’t well received by the public, costing the company nearly $1 billion. Just before Drew can carry out his demise, however, he learns that his father has suddenly passed away and he must journey across the country to Elizabethtown, Ky., to attend the funeral and see that his dad’s wish to be cremated is carried out.
Though I’m sure most of the ladies will disagree, Bloom was quite possibly the worst choice on the face of the earth for this role. I must salute him for a valiant effort to escape his swashbuckling, pointy-eared roots, but as I had anticipated, his every mannerism and voice, especially in his opening monologue, kept me expecting a horde of orcs or a band of undead pirates to emerge for him to battle at any moment. The role was meant for someone else. Say, Braff, perhaps?
Kirsten Dunst (“Spiderman,” “Mona Lisa Smile”) stars alongside Bloom as Claire, a charming and adorably annoying stewardess who decides to keep Drew company, much to his initial dismay, on his redeye flight to Kentucky. This is a much more satisfactory casting than Legolas … I mean Orlando, and I’m not saying that just because I’m male.
Dunst gives Claire the same irresistible charm that she gave to Mary Jane in the recent “Spiderman” movies, only crazies it up just enough to make Claire an entirely new and intriguing character.
Susan Sarandon (“The Banger Sisters,” “Igby Goes Down”) and Alec Baldwin (“The Aviator,” “The Hunt for Red October”) take on more minor roles, yet both sparkle.
“Elizabethtown” succeeds not only in its endeavors to be a romance and drama, but also because an awkward, somewhat dark and very funny comic relief is present throughout. Drew’s suicide attempt near the beginning of the film, which involves a steak knife and a stationary bicycle, is certainly very over the top but is also certainly hilarious. Drew’s hilariously real Kentuckian relatives also provide several thoughtful chuckles.
If you loved “Garden State,” it’s probable that you’ll like “Elizabethtown,” and emerge from the theater with a pinch of the wonderful sad sort of happiness that “Garden State” gave a generous portion of.