by Sam Gibson | Opinion Editor
Aries (March 21-April 19)
This weekend promises to be a sensual time for you, Aries. Expect to lock eyes with an alluring and cultured hottie in the Cotton District that weekend. They will recognize that you are looking luminous and offer to buy you food on a stick.
Taurus (April 20-May 20)
Be careful in coming days, Taurus. Your sign’s moment is just around the corner, but until then you should act cautiously. Avoid the crosswalks during rush hour, and definitely do not walk in front of visiting cars. Also, do not get too close to campus cats.
Gemini (May 21-June 20)
You are feeling wild, Gemini! Instead of ending up of “Bad Dawgs,” you should channel this uninhibited energy into social planning. You will intuitively know where thus party’s at on a Saturday, and are destined to be your friend group’s most hype personality.
Cancer (June 21-July 22)
Hate to break it to you, Cancer, but odds are you will only be having an “Alright, I guess..” sort of week. Like the lake by the Sanderson, you are drained. Work has been getting to  you and you really need some time to yourself. There is no shame in choosing the couch over the Cotton District.
Leo (July 23-August 22)
You are going to make some great personal strides this weekend, Leo. A spike in confidence will inspire you to make some bold moves, both in life and on all available dance stores. If you are considering a risky new hairstyle, relationship, or career move, the time is now. Like a pre-DUI Dak, you can do no wrong.
Virgo (August 23-Sept. 22)
Oh, sweet, overwhelmed Virgo…lately, your social calendar has been as full as the Perry on fried chicken day. Try to clear your schedule for a few days and go where the wind takes you. It  is supposed to be stormy in coming days, though, so try not to be blown into any trees or cars.
Libra (Sept 23.-Oct. 22)
This could be a turning point for you, Libra. All of the action on campus has inspired you to take action in your personal life. Now is the time to take stock of your relationships, and protest the people doing you wrong. The world is your Drill Field.
Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 21)
Easy now, Scorpio. You have a lot of options right now, in both your social sphere and the local babe-pool. Tempting as it may be to jump at the first exciting opportunity you’re presented with, you can afford to be choosy this weekend. Do not attempt real-life swipe right for a six, when you can hold out for a ten.
Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21)
Although many will be heading to check out MSU sports this weekend, Sagittarius, you will be drawn to commune with nature. Take your cowbell to the Horse Park or deep woods, and ring out your anger towards your roommates. It is stupid to watch Family Guy with a subwoofer. You are right and your roommate is ridiculous.
Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19)
Oh, fickle Capricorn… it is not that hard to pick a shirt for Maroon Friday. There are many shades to view from, and any of them will get you discounts at local restaurants. However, your monetary situation is disheartening lately, so you should probably only eat block meals in order to afford weekend debauchery.
Aquarius (Jan. 20- Feb. 18)
You are having a spiritual week, Aquarius. This has been reflected in your fashion choices, which have included too much of your fake Birkenstocks and too little True Maroon. This weekend will bring you back to earth, literally. You are destined to fall head first into a random apartment complex pool.
Pisces (Feb. 19- March 20)
As a large-pored water sign, it is imperative that you remember to shower in Starkville’s humid climate. Sure, you’re busy with school and socializing, but if you smell like an actual bulldog, socializing will soon be out of the equation. Cleanliness is next to Dawgliness.