A bride walks toward her soon to be husband, and the minister begins reciting their vows: “Does the groom take this bride to be his richly wedded wife? Does he promise to lavish her with gifts, pay all of her bills and keep her in a lap of luxury until debt do you part?”
I know that this scene sounds fairly ridiculous to most people. However, the age of the women and men that date or even marry strictly for the benefits has not ended. In fact, it is more rampant than ever. Maybe it is because as a college student, budgeting has become more of a necessity than a helpful tool. Perhaps, we can blame the economic recession.
I am not sure who or what to blame, but the class of citizens widely-known as gold-diggers have definitely become more accepted in society. Why is that?
Speaking from a woman’s point of view, I wonder why women have degraded themselves to the point in which they can see themselves as being bought. There is now a fairly large selection of women that have made the size of a man’s wallet to be a defining characteristic to determine if he is even worth their time.
This realization not only astonished me but angered me as well. How can we, as women who have gained the right to vote, learned to become financially independent and worked hard for equal rights in the workplace, choose to be discriminating against men for their monetary worth? This occurrence is really astonishing to me.
During the summer, I got to hear several televised interviews on the topic. I heard women define successful men as men who not only make a lot of money but are willing to spend that money on them therefore allowing them to not have to work in order to make their own money. Some women have even claimed to have taught their daughters the same thing. In other words, another generation of “gold-diggers” is being raised even as we speak.
Now, let’s say that a person gets married to another person for the sake of money. What happens if the person falls on difficult times or becomes bankrupt? I know that many people do not think about this, but for a lot of millionaires, all it takes is a bad day on Wall Street to reduce their millions to a few hundred or maybe even nothing at all.
What happens to their spouses if they were married because of benefits? In most cases, a break-up/divorce rapidly follows. What happens if there were any children involved? They get split between two parents that were not married out of love but out of benefit.
Oftentimes, marriage for money does not have the best ending as we have seen many times on the front pages of the tabloids or celebrity magazines.
It is true that most relationships do not end because “the well ran dry.” However, if the relationship continues, what about the psychological effects on the person that is benefitting from the use of their partner’s money? Every man or woman does not expect to give something for nothing. Many times there is a stipulation before their money is spent on anything. In essence, a man or woman would be selling themselves for a new car, house, vacation, or whatever they may want.
Now, I am not saying that a person that dates or marries for benefits is a bad person. It is not my intention to judge or condemn. I am merely asking when the contents of a man’s wallet became equivalent or even more valuable than his personality. Some people would prefer a rich jerk to a decent working-class citizen.
I am proud to say that I am excluded from this population. I seek value in the fact that a person is working honestly and hard to make a living. In fact, I respect these people so much that I have become one of them.
I do not need a person to make money for me when I can make it for myself. I would prefer my marriage vows to continue to say that I will love, honor and cherish all the days of my life until death do us part.
Terrisha Buckley is senior majoring in animal and dairy science. She can be contacted at [email protected].
Categories:
Women value money more in men
Tarrisha Buckley
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August 26, 2010
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